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Saturday, March 25, 2017

Eleven Plot-Holes in "Dirty Dancing"

Essayist Lucy Gransbury had watched Dirty Dancing "easily over a hundred times" when she persuaded her boyfriend to watch it for his first time. As they watched together, Gransbury for her own first time noticed many "plot holes".
While I was watching my man watch my favourite movie, I was suddenly more sensitive to all the mistakes in the film.

“Come on, guys, you’re losing him! LIFT!” I yelled inside my head, while noticing plot-hole after plot-hole after plot-hole, until I wasn’t even sure if I liked the movie any more.
Based on this experience, Gransbury wrote an article titled 11 plot holes in Dirty Dancing we’ve only just noticed, which was published on the Mama Mia website.

I especially liked Gansbury's remarks about the following "plot-holes". The images and their captions were provided by Gransbury in her article.


Baby lies about checking on her sister.

When the dorky Neil Kellerman takes Baby outside (“I love to watch your hair blowing in the breeze…” UGHH), she sees her sister stumble out of the woods with Robbie The Creep, crying, with her skirt tugged down, asking for an apology. There’s clearly been some kind of sexual assault, guys. Baby shrugs it off. Whatever, sister. Deal.

But then, when Neil takes Baby into the industrial kitchen and she sees Penny crying on the ground, she says to Neil, “I better go check on Lisa”. And then she runs to find Johnny so he can help Penny.

SO… Baby lied about helping her sister after she’d clearly been sexually assaulted, so she could help a stranger who was crying for a reason Baby didn’t know about yet. And then still doesn’t check on Lisa.


Thanks, sis. I'll be fine.

Why does Baby have to fill in anyway?

Baby has to learn how to dance with Johnny so that Penny can have an abortion. That’s the plot, and if you think about it too hard, it’s already kind of dodgy. But in the scene when Baby gets nominated to fill the Penny-shaped hole, she asks Johnny why one of the other dancers at the resort can’t fill in for Penny at the Sheldrake performance.

His response; “No, Miss Fix-it. Somebody else can’t. Maria has to work all day, she can’t learn the routines. And Janet has to fill in for Penny. Everybody works here.”

So Maria is busy. And Janet is covering for Penny’s dance classes. But what about the FIFTY OTHER WOMEN CURRENTLY DANCING BEHIND YOU, JOHNNY? They are literally standing in a room full of dancing staff, none of whom are currently working. And Johnny asked two people.

I mean, I’m glad he wasn’t very thorough, or there’d be no movie. But, jeez Johnny… maybe ask around a bit more?

Maybe one of these 50 dancers could help.

When Lisa says “where is my beige iridescent lipstick?”

It’s not a plot hole. But it sounds like the shittest lipstick in the history of makeup. Classic Lisa.


Baby is obviously favoured by both parents.

This isn’t much of a revelation, because Lisa actually comments on it. “You’re not Daddy’s girl anymore.”

But if you watch the movie and really concentrate on it, it’s actually pretty horrific. The dad openly favours Baby until she screws up. And then he begrudgingly has an actual conversation with his other daughter who has been hanging out in his house for the past eighteen years, desperately awaiting the moment when her father will acknowledge her existence.

When Lisa gets up and sings her awful solo at the end, the parents are exchanging giggles at her shit-ness. And yet, when Baby interrupts the concert to dance with the man she’s been sleeping with behind her parents’ backs, they get all gooey and proud, with the mother even saying “I think she gets this from me”.

It’s okay Lisa. Someone will love you. Your therapist, maybe.

"Please love me, Daddy."


Why do they even let Johnny dance at the end?

They literally just fired this guy for sleeping with an underage guest. And then, when he casually walks into the hall and interrupts their prized final concert, Max Kellerman – the guy who spends half the movie yelling at Johnny – doesn’t even speak up. Johnny announces that he wants to dance, and everyone is just like “Meh, okay. Let’s clear the stage. The guy in the black leather jacket looks trustworthy. Let him dance.”

I mean, I’m SO GLAD they did… but you’d think at least that pain-in-the-ass Neil would try to stop him.

Even Newman doesn't stop them.


Baby’s dad doesn’t actually apologise to Johnny.

“I know you weren’t the one who got Baby in trouble. When I’m wrong, I say I’m wrong.” says Jake Houseman to Johnny. But then doesn’t actually follow it with, “I was wrong. I’m sorry.” Jeeez, Jake. You only accused him of knocking up his best friend, carelessly getting her butchered with a knife, and then perversely targeting your daughter. A vague apology should do it.


Baby wasn't even in the corner.

At best, nobody puts Baby next to a pillar.
But Johnny left them there.
So you’re right, Johnny. Nobody actually does put Baby in a corner.

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