I am just a girl who misses the saltwater in her hair… wait is that dirty? Crap. I always try to sound so elegant and profound and it just ends up warranting some prepubescent chuckle.One of her blog's articles is titled How Ship Life is Like Dirty Dancing. The article includes the following passages and illustrations (click to enlarge):
I lived on a cruise ship for three years and am adjusting to land life again. I have changed. I am sorting through these changes here for my friends, family and the world to read. Slowly realizing there is nothing in the world like ship life… and that’s ok.
... As I was watching [the movie], I kept noticing sharp similarities between the world at Kellerman’s and the cruise ship bubble. I have watched The Love Boat and documentaries claiming to “expose what the cruise ship companies don’t want you to know!” and honestly, they don’t capture the real nature of ship life. Nothing really does. But Dirty Dancing comes close. Let’s explore:
An obvious caste system
There is a hierarchy at Kellerman’s much like on the ship. It’s not just guests and crew, but a hierarchy within the crew. Poor, wrong-side-of-the-tracks Johnny Castle falls to the bottom. ...
Simple dance classes full of geriatrics
.... As someone who has been forced to film these lessons, it always makes me laugh to watch professionally trained dancers teach the waltz to someone wearing flip-flops and socks.
Awful, awful, awful dad jokes
.... there’s no shortage of the most groan-worthy jokes you’ve ever heard. Some are so bad that don’t even deserve to be called “Dad jokes.”
Special entertainment
.... If you’re a lover of magic, ventriloquism, juggling or any combination of those horrible things, you’re in luck. ....
Those poor young people
There is always one or two early 20-somethings who got dragged on an Alaskan cruise with their grandparents and are doing all they can to get you to sneak them into crew bar. ...
Doesn't this look just like every 18-year-old's dream?
Being left stranded
We all remember that first hot scene where Johnny shows Baby how to grind on the dance floor. ... As Kiki put it, “he humps and dumps.” To which I responded, “Just like a ship guy!” ...
Remember how Robby, the creep, knocked up poor Penny the dancer and refused to help her or acknowledge that they were ever together? Hate to tell you, but that happens, too.
Shitty places to live
... Crew have crap cabins, except for the bridge folk. ... Johnny may have an expansive cabin with way more room than any ship worker could ever imagine, but he has no windows. ...
The worst end-of-season / voyage shows
At Kellerman’s it was a guest talent show. On ships (at least mine anyway) it was a crew talent show followed by what we call “walk-downs.” Any way you look at it, it’s overly sentimental, cheesy as hell and something the staff seriously dreads.
Zero tolerance for fraternization
Johnny slept with Baby so they fired him. Pretty standard. I never knew anyone who got caught with a guest and lived to tell the tale. Doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. A lot.
... I saved the best for last – CREW AREA!
Y’all watch this and tell me it doesn’t conjure up old memories of the crew bar. Granted there would be less soul music and more reggaetone, but it’s pretty accurate. They even got the token black couple. Ok, ok, the diversity is the only difference here. ....
I cut much of the article for my blog article here, but you can read McKenzie Ames' entire article there.
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